time to face it, coward

this is the moment that i've been waiting for and afraid to face at the same time.
confession, is really a bitch. it makes my heart race so damn fast.
it makes breathing seems damn hard. it makes me wonder am i doing the right thing.
but i know, this is wat i gotta do. oh gosh...
i used to be brave, i used to have all my guts, i used to dive in whenever i want to.
but now.. i got so timid, i'm afraid to face my feelings, i'm a coward.
n right now, i knew i couldn't hide it any longer, its time to let it out.
i hope for the best. God bless.

Miss you like crazy

i miss u once in a while
i miss u once we're apart..
i miss u when u're gone
i miss u after we said goodbye..

i miss u day and night
i miss u even though we dun fight
i miss u when u left
i miss u cuz u're coming back

i miss u and its a fact
i miss u till i slept
i miss u cuz my heart misses u
i miss u cuz my mind thinks of u

i miss u like all the time
i miss u and i'm counting the time
i miss u like crazy
i miss u cuz missing u makes me lazy

i miss u in so many ways
and i do hope,
u're d same...

thoughts

it has been an unforgettable few days with u.. i can feel the connection between us is stronger now.. those small little moments meant alot to me.. but den again, should i tell u? hmmm... or should i keep it this, letting things flow on its own.. its been 15 hours, n i guess... i miss u already..

dun leave?

glad that u're back.. i'm more den happy to see u, we hanged out.. i enjoyed joking with u... i guess its more den enuf dis way.. n the fact tht in the cinema, the natural way of us sitting so close... in the sense of a little bit of body contact, it felt comfortable..
i dun know whether i'll ever tell u dat i do like u.. cuz i'm unsure whether do i want more den that or not.. despite of my own selfishness dat i wan u for myself, i think i do need to spare a thought for u as well. wat if everything changed after that? i'm sick n tired of ppl coming in n out of my life, i'm tired that after letting them in, but in the end all they wanna do is leave.. aren't u sick of these?
God send these ppl for a reason, and for what reason i think its up to me to figure it out.. but theres got a way to keep them from leaving rite?

PAL

people always leave... ALWAYS!
i hate it when people leave... sometimes, i wonder shld i care so much for them, cuz in the end, they are gonna leave eventually.. human beings are fucking selfish animals...

no title blogpost

finally done with my final exam, that marks the end of my uni life as well. now, its all about working, earning money to support myself. i'm on my own from now on. sounds scary thou. KL, a place where i can be free, where the opportunities are. we'll see what will i become in 1 year.. i hoped for the best.

well well well, u.. wat can i say, i'm confused with wat i wanna do. i am not sure whether i wanna confess, or keep things this way? the biggest part, is that i'm afraid things might change once the secret is out. what if i misunderstand why god send u? His true meaning. how am i supposed to figure out? wat if He sent u, jz to be by my side, but nth else? wat if i screw dis up? i will never forgive myself.
so many times, my dreams reflected what i dared not do in real life, with u. this is what happens when ur heart and ur mind clashes. the fact is, i'm not as brave as before anymore.
well, anyway, ur bthday is coming up. lets hope u have a memorable one aite?
-ben dan-

gosh

omg. u looked so delicious tonight.. hard to resist le...
i'm so gonna dream about u again, even thou u'll be sleeping beside me..
oh gosh...